CATULLUS 24

Juventius, you're the cutest of the lot,
not just of your relations that exist
but those unborn. A fact you may have missed
about this new guy that you love - he's got

No money, none at all. The thing to do
with someone who's that poor, is give him cash,
rather than think of giving him a screw.
He isn't good enough for you - so rash

of you to think he is - when he is broke,
no money and no servants to his name
You're much too pretty, boy, to waste a poke
on someone shabby, It would be a shame

but you'll ignore me, do what you want, so
I'll mention that he's poor just so you know.

CATULLUS 25

Thallus, you ditzy queen, you're rabbit weak,
soft as a feather, cute as babys' ears.
When old men with soft dicks reach out and tweak
tired foreskins, you're more limp, but it appears

you have another side. Brisk like the wind
at dinner's end, when everyone is drunk
you grab stuff. Afterwards your host can't find
his favourite things - and they're all in your trunk.

My cashmere shawl, my spanish linen and
my embossed stationery. They're all on show
in your apartment. I'd scratch on your hand
Verses so rude that everyone would know

you steal - but you don't blush. Shame that would kill
Most is for you just one more sexy thrill.