Of no particular interest to anyone except trans people, probably

[rozk]

In the Comments to my previous post, what seems an interesting if heated discussion of stealth issues seems to be building up - if you scroll down past questions of provincial life and whether or not oatc thinks I am a bad person. It's a conversation we need to be having - several of the elephants in the room.

Comments

Trying not to sound pretentious while stating the blindingly obvious ...

[haggis.livejournal.com]

One of the major lesson I've learned as I've educated myself about trans stuff is that there are many, many ways to live as a trans person. Some people go for hormones and surgery, some people go stealth, some people are loudly genderqueer, some people know from an early age and some take years to figure it out. I find it fascinating and instructive to recognise that there are many paths to wholeness and to accept that, however much I learn, I have no right to judge how other people do it. (Especially as a ciswoman, obviously.) I am also awed and humbled by how hard some people have to struggle to feel whole and be treated fairly.

[paulathomas.livejournal.com]

Listen peeps - being trans is difficult enough without a requirement for being 'out'. If you are out, I am, then bully for you. Great!! But...

People's lives are messy and complicated. If someone lives somewhere or in circumstances where they assess, and the individual trans person has to judge their own circumstances, they will not be out thena that judgement should be respected.

We, an oppressed community, can break new ground here. We can become the first oppressed community whose reaction to being oppressed is assert that we will not play the game of looking for someone else to oppress.

[cangetmad.livejournal.com]

Yep, this, and, what is it with trans people being asked to do better at everything radical than cis people?

Also, Roz, it's of particular interest to some non-trans people!

Helen is confused

[(Anonymous)]

I read it and I don't really understand what the fuss is about.

If some people choose one behaviour and others choose another, what concern is it of anyone else ? We each own our own lives and are responsible for it. I may not think their choice is the right one for me, I might even believe they have made the wrong one for them, but so long as I respect their right to live their lives as they wish and they return such a courtesy, there is no harm.

If, however, a person of one behaviour chooses to consider this as a privileged position from which to crticise and silence others I may have some objections. Further, if they seek to author other's choices to fit their viewpoint, then we are entering the Bindel-zone and I may have something rude to say.

It's down to respect. The trans world is no different to the rest of society where we globally have nothing in common with each other than our presumed humanity and group together in common-interest groups in opposition to others. If you are a member of that group, you take part in the dialogue that shapes it. If you are not a member of that group, then you have no right to input.

So long as you respect the separateness of those two conditions, I see no conflict. Right now I feel that there are confusions involved in recognising these conditions apply.

Re: Helen is confused

[natalie-456.livejournal.com]

Helen's hit the nail on the head - oatc's attack on your post (Roz) was definately entering Bindel-zone - it was totally unprovoked. Ok, they are in a difficult position in their lives but thats no reason to take any anger out on you by saying your not grateful for the GRC and that their shouldn't be a new grass roots movement.

Ok, especially seeing by how many lives are taken for being Trans, there are situations where being Stealth can be important. And of course, that brings out a whole host of issues - especially when it comes to activism.

Stealth trans people need to realise their privileges, and out-trans people (like myself) have to understand that being stealth is as valid a choice as being out (provided it doesn't lead to them taking the "i'm moar tranz than u" route), and often being out can be dangerous.

[nyecamden.livejournal.com]

I read the comments and found it very interesting. My trans is young, I haven't really got a handle on all the issues yet. [friend] was wildly projecting, but that is not unusual!

[x-mass.livejournal.com]

which is why i also tried to start a conversation about it on my blog and i'm doing an extended post about it later today when I've re-edited a piece i wrote this morning so that it flows properly